funniest thing about the thing (1982) is that the titular thing is both a master manipulator who can perfectly replicate anyone but also a big bundle of nerves who flips out and starts screaming and turning into 5000 meat parts at once the INSTANT it’s found out
like at one point the thing replicates a guy who has a heart condition, promptly has a heart attack, and then gets so freaked out by the defibrillator it starts biting people
the thing is a master actor who is absolutely awful at improv and the show keeps going wrong
50s cheryl, seconds away from abandoning her lavender fiancee at the altar: I can’t do this anymore, arch-arch :( I’m queer! I’m in love with 1950s toni! I never should’ve agreed to marry you instead of her.
archie, seconds away from discovering the concept of homosexuality: gosh, cher, I didn’t know you could have a lady for a husband. does that mean I can ask jughead to be my wife :)
